Paraguayan Ironies

The ironies of Paraguay never cease to bore me. I find it counterintuitive in the belief that drinking milk quickly followed by watermelon will result in nothing less than death. On the other hand, the consumption of red meat three times a day will have no lasting long-term effects. I envision the following scenario. A Paraguayan male drops dead at the early age of sixty five. He lived a happy but unhealthy life, suffering from a poor heart condition as a result of high red meat consumption. On the day of his heart attack, he conincidentally consumed watermelon and milk. From this mere conincidence, the people of Paraguay have infered that the combination of milk and watermelon will cause an acid reaction leading in immediate death.

I also find it odd in a nation plagued with poverty, ninety nine percent of the population has at least one television and any person over the age of eight is well equipped with a cell phone. Furthermore, on rainy days schools throughout the country are closed, because it is deemed unsuitable travel conditions for small children. Ironically, my house is located not far from the local elementary school, and regardless of the magnitude of the rainstorm the children of my neighborhood have little problems getting to my house. They also don´t have any troubles to getting to dance class, or playing soccer. I also can´t help but find the satire in the fact that a nation obsessed with hygiene doesn´t see the value in washing hands. I, as an American, am under constant criticism that I come from a nation which puts little worth in hygiene. The average Paraguayan takes between three to four showers a day depending on the heat. However, there is never any soap in any public restroom, I´ve only ever seen people wash their hands with water, and nobodies ever even heard of antibacterial hand gell even though it´s sold at the pharmacy. Generally speaking, Paraguayans generally have dirty feet, but always clean shoes and fat people tell skinny people that they are overweight. As, you can imagine the list goes on.

Yet, the greatest irony of all, is despite all these annoyances I`ve still somehow come to find a sincere passion for Paraguay, its culture, and its people.